Nesting Instincts

Have you ever heard of the term “nesting” and no it’s not just something that birds do! During pregnancy, some soon-to-be mothers take part in this phenomenon known as “nesting”. 

What is nesting? 

It can be thought of almost like a bird readying her nest by gathering the necessary supplies before she lays her eggs. Nesting can occur in many different ways but is usually considered as having an overwhelming urge paired with an unusual burst of energy to clean or organize/decorate one’s environment (household) or even one’s life before the baby arrives. However, it is also important to note that not everyone will feel the nesting instinct, it can vary from person to person and that is perfectly normal and okay!

 

Who can experience nesting?

You may be thinking to yourself “Well of course expecting mothers can experience this phenomenon!” and you would be correct. But did you also know that fathers and adoptive parents can experience this phenomenon as well. As they also prepare to welcome a baby into their life!

 

When does nesting occur?

Nesting instincts can happen at any stage of your pregnancy but tend to occur during the third trimester. Which starts at 28 weeks and ends at roughly 40 weeks or until you give birth. These final three months of pregnancy, when it's getting closer to the time of delivery, are usually when parents both biological and adoptive make sure they have all the items necessary to welcome their baby home like a crib, diapers, and clothing.

“One of the apparent paradoxes of nesting is that in the third trimester of pregnancy, women tell us that they are more tired while simultaneously showing an increase in activity. So the urge to nest is a very powerful motivating force”
— Mel Rutherford
 

Why do people nest?

There can be many different reasons as to why some people nest, it can serve as a protective function and can be connected to our ancestral past to help provide a safe environment that can encourage and promote bonding and attachment between mom and baby. Creating that safe space is something that can be enjoyed especially by the mother while she takes care of her newborn because infant care can be all-consuming in the early postpartum period and there may be limited time in that period to create that environment otherwise. Anthropological data suggests that having control over your environment is a key element of childbirth preparation and making decisions about where your birth will take place and who is going to be in the birth environment. Nesting is an adaptive behavior. Adaptive behavior is any behavior that enables an individual to adjust to the environment appropriately and effectively. In this case, it would be people who are pregnant organizing aspects of their surroundings and/or life. An emotional need can also be associated with nesting instincts as a way to pass the time before one gives birth. 

 

What does nesting look like?

Nesting instincts can come in many different forms and vary from person to person, there isn’t just one “standard” way we see this happen. It can range from cleaning, organizing, the company you keep, bursts of energy, decorating, home projects, to meal prepping.

  • Space preparation which is the form of nesting most commonly used as an example can include energy bursts, cleaning, mental focus on household projects, purging of old/ unwanted items in the house as well as organizing household items.

  • Social selectivity is when someone who is pregnant becomes selective about the company they keep and prefers to be around people they trust.

  • Making decisions about where one is going to give birth (i.e. at home, water birth, or in a hospital) and who will be involved (i.e. partners, doulas, or other support people).

  • In some instances, project completion (like building a crib) and decorating are prioritized more highly for people nesting than cleaning behaviors.

  • Some people may even prepare meals to freeze so when the baby comes home it makes things easier.

Some new moms want to feel in control of certain aspects of their lives like their environment before the baby arrives.

 

When do nesting instincts end?

There hasn’t been a definitive answer but the nesting period tends to decline anywhere between birth to around eight weeks postpartum. 

 
“I’ve been organizing a lot in our house...it’s just this desire to organize. I think that’s part of my nesting.”
— Katherine Schwarzenegger
 
 
Allison RollansNesting, 3rd TrimesterComment